Ask Uttara: How to best face an unknown fear about my heath?

Question:  How to best face an unknown fear about my health?  I am seeing a surgeon about a serious medical condition; but ultimately I am scared to trust my instincts about being proactive. I don't know if I trust myself to make this decision and deal with the consequences involved.  And I am getting too many opinions from the peanut gallery that are extremely unhelpful!

Dearest Reader:

Wow – I am sorry for your suffering.   Illness is very hard to deal with; it is distracting; even if the medical issue doesn’t involve major physical pain, the mind-space of being unwell is very difficult.

Fear makes it worse.

You state that you are scared to trust your instincts; why?  Have they led you astray in the past?  Are there too many outer voices?  Inner voices? 

Your body is not at ease; dis-ease.  Disease.  Once you are aware of the condition, you attempt to begin the journey back to ease.  Initially you gather information; some of it from others.  “Others” can be trusted friends and confidants; they can be doctors and specialists.

And hopefully your information gathering includes going inward and meeting yourself.  Have you been ignoring or rationalizing symptoms?  How long as this situation REALLY been going on?  What are you doing with your mind, your diet, your lifestyle that can support your journey to wellness and wholeness and are you willing to start making those shifts RIGHT NOW?

I do hope and pray that you have the relationship with YOUR body AND with your mind where you have at least a little feeling about what is the truth.  That way when you come to a conclusion – or when someone speaks to you or gives advice; be them friend/specialist/doctor/priest; your mind either says “oh, yeah” or “oh, -- uh huh, no.”

Usually the very first impulse of the body/mind complex will tell you where to go; it is the second-guessing that is dangerous.  Do you have a personal read on the situation?  If you do then ignore everyone else; only you can see your life through your particular lense; this event is to teach you something or to usher you into a new area of life; what would that be?

Some time with a therapist or independent person could be helpful as you sort out your options in an unemotional and practical manner.  But no matter what, listen to that little inner voice that might say “don’t wait” or “this is not MY doctor” or “let’s try something alternative.”

 

Other options include prayer (when you are asking God/Goddess for direction); meditation (when you just create the mental space and perhaps God/Goddess has an opportunity to speak to you); asking your personal guides for signs and symbols; or even praying for a dream that will guide you in the proper direction.

Sending you healing light; let me know how things progress.

Deepest shanti,

Jill